Wednesday, February 6, 2008

It my FAULT! Part 1

No, I'm not taking the blame for anything. I would NEVER do that (ask my husband).

I'm talking about one of my faults. And there are plenty, maybe I'll post a series of blog posts on them.

The one I'm talking about today is my need for change and constant action. I cannot sit still. Not in an ADHD way, just in a life way. I can't "settle down". Is it the Gemini in me?

I am constantly wanting to go on vacation. And not just a want, like, "oh, that would be nice". More like a yearning, a calling to get in the car and GO. And it won't be surpressed. The longer I go without "getting out of town" the more depressed I get.

And I'm constantly signing up for new things. Whether it be classes or magazine or committments. I'm always wanting to learn more, do more.

And I'm always trying new things. I love trying new gadgets, new foods, new crafts, etc. I actually get mad at my husband when he orders a burger AGAIN at a restaurant. I'm always trying to get him to try something new. I get tons of cookbooks and cooking magazines and am constantly making new things. I love to try new things.

Doesn't sound too bad, right?

Except that I get overwhelmed sometimes. In the quest to try new things I usually try TOO MANY new things. And then I don't know how to back out.

And my NEED to travel can become costly! Luckily, we live somewhere that we can drive to Vegas, drive to San Diego, drive to LA, drive to Mexico (although I don't suggest it) or even drive to another city 2 hours away.

And sometimes, MAJOR life decisions are hard for me. This is my current problem. I have to admit, I've never had the same job for more than 3 years. Until my current job. I never even worked for the same company for that long. But, I'm going on 8 years with my current company and 4 years in my current job. And I'm starting to feel the need for change. Which, wouldn't be bad since my boss is retiring in two years and I'll have to find something anyway.

Except, I feel like I need to change NOW. I am starting to get that depressed feeling I get when I'm stagnant. And I don't like it. I wish I could just tell myself to ride out the next two years. I've got a sweet thing going. I only work two days one week, three days the next. In my mind I know it would be best to keep this up for at least another year and a half until Jocelyn could start preschool. But, my mind doesn't always listen. Something tells me I need to move now. Is it intuition? I don't know.

So, I started looking at jobs. I found one that I know I would LOVE (for however long). I will apply for it. The worst that can happen is that I don't get it, at least I don't have to find another job right now. But, if I did get it, I would have to go to a SIX WEEK TRAINING! Would I survive, probably. Would it be hard as hell? Yes! But, at least I'll apply and then wait and see.

In the meantime, I've got a few more months until we go camping again. Maybe I should try knitting or something in the meantime!

13 comments:

holly said...

i TOTALLY get this. i have started to learn french five times. i have various cross-stitch projects waiting to be finished. i have the car at-the-ready for him to say "let's go to (someplace different!)". i have 3,452 project books of stuff to do with qoh.
i am starting a new job in two weeks *partially* because of the need-new-stuff stuff.

but i'm not a gemini...

CamiKaos said...

oh I get it girl... why do you think I started a blog.

Megan@SortaCrunchy said...

Hey, you SHOULD try knitting! And if you are anything like this Gemini sister, you'll get exactly one scarf exactly one-quarter of the way done before you bounce off to the next distraction.

sybil law said...

I get it to an extent. I know I am bored to tears not working right now, and I am looking for stuff that I can fit in to MY schedule (actually, my daughter's, but whatever.) I am a restless person at home and I move constantly. But there are times I just looove doing nothing and just being still. Aaahhhh....

Corey~living and loving said...

I am sort of like that, but not about the traveling.
just the jumping into too many things.
I am at my current job for 10 years now....and I am so burnt. ugh...

DIXIECHICK said...

My husband as the same restless spirit when it comes to traveling...I am with you on the job thing...

Keara @ Now I Know What Life Is All About said...

I tried posting yesterday but I guess Blogger was down...

Must be the gemini in you. I am exactly like that! Too many projects started and not finished and I am always itching to go somewhere new. I guess it is good that I move to a new state every 6 months or so. LOL! Good luck at the new job interview!

Lisa said...

I'm with ya! My hubby travels ALL the time with work so we just go with when we want too. It's a little harder now that I have one in school but we still do it. Yes she has already missed three weeks of school but it's only kindergarden and I always get her work ahead of time! BTW, what's the job you applied for??

Jo Beaufoix said...

I get it too. The longest I've been in a job is four years. And when I go back to work I'll be ready for a change. I used to really worry about this, then I read somewhere that some people are just like this. It doesn't mean we're not 'sticker'. We give what we do our all, but we need knew stuff to give our all to.
I think it's good. It's good to want to learn and grow. It's just hard when you've got that itch but you don't quite know how to scratch it. Blah. Have some chocolate.

mielikki said...

Don't try the knitting. You'll have yarn everywhere. I promise.
The beauty of my job, is that I can bounce around different areas of the hospitals, and, even different hospitals if I choose to. This is a tough one, and a struggle I know all too well.

Laura said...

As much of a "status quo" person as I tend to be, I definitely have a good dose of the itch for change as well. I love venturing out into new things, but then crave the comforts of familiarity.

Great post!

Heather said...

I get that way too. That's why we're going to New Orleans tomorrow!

Bubblewench said...

I'm totally like that too. 3 years is a long time for me to 'sit still' i have the jones to move and groove and well, we just bought a house..